Archive for September, 2011


Awesome work time-wasters (part vii)

famicomWhat were those old-school consoles called that flooded the SA market back when we were kids? The NES rip-offs with the red rectangular controllers? “Golden China” or some shit like that?

Anyway, there was a time when all the kids had one (except me. Christ I was deprived) and spent hour after hour mercilessly bashing the buttons to classics like Contra, Megaman and Super Mario, their brains slowly turning to gloop while they forgot how to do basic things like read and go to the loo unassisted.

Well what if I told you they’ve rolled all those rad old games into ONE?! That’s right. Hold onto your balls.


Struggling to Get Fit? Outrun A Zombie!

Photoshop_Jogging_018789_Jogging is shit. No one really wants to put on their little jogging shorts and lace up their R800 jogging shoes and venture out into the world for a jog and anyone that says otherwise is clearly delusional.

Jogging, experts will tell you, was invented to help humans run the fuck away from things that were trying to eat us. It served a clear purpose thousands of years ago but nowadays, unless you’re trying to outrun the police, jogging is a bit naf.

BUT, there’s a new iPhone / iPod Touch / Android app that’s going to change all that. To put it simply, it’s a game you play by running… AWAY FROM FUCKING FLESH EATING ZOMBIES!


Interview With A Tiger

CopaseticA good friend and fellow blogger, Miss Copasetic, decided to be a total badass last week and do an interview with your Tiger pal, which rates right up there with the MFM interview I did as one of my favourite interviews of all time.

What made it sick was she chose a song that she felt best encapsulated the essence of the Tiger and then posted the interview interspliced with the lyrics.

She fucking hit the nail right on the head by choosing the “Going Out West” cover by Queens Of The Stone Age, a song close to my big ol’ back heart. Hit the link below for the full interview.


Is this Song Really That Crap?

lana del rayI read Stereogum from time to time because I like to be one of the cool kids when it comes to music and the kids at Stereogum are so fucking cool it makes my balls hurt just thinking about them.

They’re not as cool as the kids at Pitchfork though. Phwoar! Those kids listen to bands that haven’t even been invented yet.

So I was cruising Stereogum on the weekend when I came across a video by Lana Del Ray called “Blue Jeans” that I thought was pretty decent. Sultry vocals, twanging guitars, and lyrics I honestly didn’t think were that bad. Pop your headphones on and give this a spin…


The Nod

MariachiThere’s a great spot for all-you-can-eat sushi on Strand called Active Sushi where J-Rab, Jennyjen and I went on Saturday night to eat sushi until we were drunk on it.

We sat at the best table in the place, a quiet alcove of couches where we could sprawl out and watch the escalator below us turning endlessly as it brought people upstairs to eat and back down again into the howling wind outside.

From where we sat we also had a killer view of everyone in the restaurant. The table closest to us had pink helium balloons floating above it and was set for about 20 people, all of them unremarkable in every way. Except one man.


I Worry About The Intelligence Of My Readers

9973TressDunceCapI do.

I mean I love you goofy basterds, every single one of you, even the trolls, but sometimes I think we could all benefit from some educational content, something specially designed to educate using the powerful visual medium of MOVING PICTURES.

So, for your viewing pleasure, I’ve dug out an old educational video I know you guys are going to get a lot of value from.

By the look of it, I’d say it was shot in the late 70s / early 80s, but I’m pretty sure we watched this EXACT video a good couple of times in highschool, so please get your textbooks out and take notes as you go, there will be a quiz later Winking smile


SlickTiger Learns the Fine Art Of Bashing Zombies Into Parked Cars

4a122b1d01e3a3f5dcae480f078cbb47You could do a pretty interesting study on why so many people in our generation have a total fixation on zombies.

For me, there’s just something about the entire system grinding to a complete halt that kinda appeals to me. No more mundane routines, no more work pressures, none of that fabricated bullshit would matter anymore.

Of course, you’d live every moment in blood-curdling fear and probably have to do some pretty unspeakable shit to stay alive, but as long as you’d done your homework, watched every zombie movie known to man and played games like Zombie Highway, you’d definitely survive at least a week or two.


What Happens When Creatives Switch From Coke To LSD

meh.ro5604The stereotype that ad agencies are riddled with cocaine-fuelled creatives who live like rockstars, burn out in their late 30s and then spend the remainder of their lives living in Buddhist retreats mumbling pay-off lines in their sleep isn’t true.

They take other drugs too.

If you don’t believe me, just watch this truly mind-bogglingly bad piece-of-turd advert Brazil produced for the Nissan Frontier that was clearly inspired by a 5 day acid binge.

After you’ve watched it, ask yourself this one simple question: what does that ad make you want to do more, buy a Nissan or drill a hole in your skull?



SlickTiger And The iPad2 – the Saga Continues

redneckHi and welcome to the second instalment of a series of posts I’m planning on writing about my new iPad2 from the perspective of a complete tech retard.

When we last left off, your trusty narrator and host SlickTiger had just fired up his shiny new iPad2 3G for the first time when he encountered his first major hurdle – no micro SIM card.

Micro SIMs are identical to normal SIMs, only about 2 thirds the size. Not too sure why Apple decided you need these irritating little things, but apparently it’s the same for iPhones.


Sex her the Stamos Way

john-stamos-3John Stamos, like Eddie Murphy, hardly seems to have aged a day in the last 20 years which, up until I watched the video below, was pretty much the most amazing thing about him.

But that’s all changed now (thanks to Miss Copasetic). After watching this video featuring Stamos and a super secret celebrity that shall not be named (ok, it’s Bob Saget), J-Rab and my relationship has risen to heights I never thought possible.

Stamos has perfected the art of sexing your woman gently, tenderly and soulfully and isn’t afraid to share his winning techniques in this ground-breaking video, so kick back, put on some Kenny G and prepare to have your life changed FOREVER.