Archive for March, 2012

30
Mar
12

Ladbrokes predictions for the Bulls vs Stormers game

DuwenageDewaldt110320-passesGbgAwhile back I posted about online betting site Ladbrokes which has recently launched in South Africa, but which is wildly popular in the UK and has been for no less than one hundred and twenty years.

The kind folks at Ladbrokes hooked your Tiger pal up with tickets to the J&B Met and gave him some tips on what horses to bet on which were scarily accurate.

So, with the big Stormers vs Bulls game coming up, I thought I’d post some of the odds Ladbrokes are giving for the game so you guys can win millions, split the loot with me and jet off to the Bahamas to go into early retirement.

Here’s the down-lizzo:

  • Odds of Stormers winning: 4/7
  • Odds of Bulls winning: 6/4
  • Stormers half-time lead: 4/6
  • Bulls half-time lead: 11/8
  • Half-time draw: 11/1

That’s just a little taste of what you can find on the Ladbrokes site. Head over there to get more odds (www.ladbrokes.co.za), open an account, put some money down on Saturday’s game and get ready to laugh all the way to the bank.

 

 

Got your back homes. It’s get rich or die tryin’ here on TFW (not to be confused with “Get rich tie-dying”, the dismally unsuccessful self-help book published after the acid wave broke in the mid 60s).

Word.

-ST

30
Mar
12

Tiger Bites: Vol.2 (Bosco Delrey, Screaming Females, Liz Green)

BoscoMemphisI know what you guys want because it’s Friday and I want it too – something, anything to kill some time and bring the weekend on a little faster.

Good new is I got just the thing for ya. This week is 70’s psychedelic stoner rock legends Bosco Delrey, weirdo grungey basement dwellers Screaming Females and old school acoustic blues siren Liz Green.

And then, right at the end of it all, I’m going to throw in something mellow to ease you into the weekend gently and who knows? Maybe give you something to smile about.

Let’s kick it off with ol’ Bosco Delrey first with their video for “Baby’s Got A Blue Flame” because it’s my favourite of the three and has a blonde bass guitarist that is going to completely fuck your shit up.

 

 

Next up it’s five foot hellraiser Marissa Paternoster belting out “It All Means Nothing” off the Screaming Females upcoming album Ugly.

If you don’t know this band I can almost guarantee you that when you hear … sing you will be overcome with a strong desire to punch her in the throat, but give this track a little time and play it again in a day or so and you just might have one of those, “Huh… it’s actually pretty cool” moments.

The video is pretty rough though. Maybe go back to whatever it was you were doing and just let the song play in the background.

Don’t say I didn’t warn ya. It’s like she read my “Stray Cat Recipes” post and took that shit to heart…

 

 

We’re going to tone things right down with this sombre little piece from Liz Green. The video was painstakingly made entirely from paper and filmed with stop animation.

I think it’s on a whole other level. Definitely show this to your friends.

They will think you are very cool.

 

 

Lastly, here’s the surprise I promised. Are ya ready kids?

I tracked down the new Edward Sharpe And The Magnetic Zeros single for you, it’s called “Man On Fire”.

Admittedly it’s no “Home” but I still really like this song and am stoked they’re back with album number two cause number one was a real game-changer for me.

 

 

Have a killer weekend party people and look after your bad selves Winking smile

-ST

29
Mar
12

The Nokia Lumia 800 Three Weeks In

nokia-lumia-800-angle-main-imageIt’s been nearly a month since I got my hands on the Lumia 800, one of the first Nokia Windows 7 phones to be released to market and I can still hardly find fault with this phone.

So far I’ve looked at form factor, some of the live tiles, Twitter and Facebook on the phone, the camera and the battery life (which did improve after I updated the phone, thanks Seerower!).

Today we’re synching this puppy with my PC, checking out the Skydrive and playing around with Office cause I’m thorough that way. I’m like Ogden Nash walking on the beach. I leave no tern unstoned. [SFX: Crickets].

Synching:

This is an interesting one. You can’t synch a Windows 7 phone to your PC unless you download Zune, which is a 100MB file.

I did this a little reluctantly because to be honest, with Windows Media Player and iTunes already fighting for dominance over the media on my PC, the last thing I needed was another media player in the mix getting all my media confused and insisting on obscure file formats in a fascist attempt to force some kind of twisted brand loyalty.

 

 

Aaannyway, I downloaded Zune, installed it, synched my phone to my PC and actually found the whole experience relatively painless. Zune turned out to be not so bad, it quietly synchs the content on your phone with your machine and the Zune interface looks pretty slick.

It gives you instant access to the Microsoft Marketplace where you can buy any number of apps, the prices of which are all listed in RANDS, which is a major bonus.

It also must have had a sneaky conversation with Windows Media Player because my entire music library was just magically in Zune the minute I fired it up, album art and everything.

Of course, my problem now is that with a Macbook and an iPad back at home and a PC and a Windows 7 phone that I use day-to-day, I’ve permanently got one foot in the iSide of life and one in the Microsoft camp with content scattered EVERYWHERE.

Yeah I know, #firstworldproblems right? Man the fuck up Slick, there are starving kids in Africa who have never even SEEN an iPad, never mind use one everyday to play Angry Birds Space!

 

 

Skydrive:

I touched on this is my last review, but the Skydrive is truly one of the things that makes this phone super slick.

Think of it as your own personal hard drive in the sky with the added bonus that you can back your entire phone up on your Skydrive.

This means when you eventually upgrade, provided your new phone is a Windows Mobile device, you’ll simply log on to your Skydrive and minutes later, all the content from your old phone will be transferred to your new one.

 

 

For a borderline OCD freak like me, this is a huge deal because it means that I’ll never lose a contact and even better than that, I’ll only need to link my contacts’ different accounts up once and the Skydrive will remember that shit FOR LIFE.

Also you can obviously access your Office docs from anywhere. You just hit https://skydrive.live.com/, log in to your account and there your files are, ready to be shared with the world.

It’s also a killer way to backup all your music and photos if you can spare the bandwidth. On my current measly internet cap it would take me 10 months just to get my music up there alone but it’s something I’d love to do one day because hard drives crash, but SKYDRIVES are forever yo.

 

 

Office:

Which brings me neatly to Office. On older incarnations of Windows phone (or Windows Mobile as it was known) you could easily synch your phone to Office on your computer and BAM! Every douchey work contact you ever saved was on your phone, as well as all your calendar appointments and your emails.

Which was great. But try actually opening simple Word docs or Excel spreadsheets and they quickly became a nightmare to actually edit or use in any way.

The way Office works on the Lumia 800 is so dead simple, at first I thought I was missing something. The whole experience has been streamlined to the point where creating a new spreadsheet can be done by touching the screen twice and maybe swiping once depending on what screen you were last on in the Office tile.

The responsiveness of the touch screen means you can actually legitimately create and edit documents without losing your mind because the screen you’re looking at is cluttered to the max with tiny icons you keep pressing my mistake.

 

 

You can also go the whole hog and do what’s called an Office 365 synch, which will replicate your office suite on your phone so that all your aforementioned douchey contacts are just a touch away.

I didn’t do this though. I keep the line between my work life and my phone separate. I’m old school that way.

So all in all, the Lumia 800 continues to impress. I’ll wrap this up in the next Lumia 800 post where I’ll be looking at internet browsing and wracking my brain to find any negative points (if they exist) about this phone so that you guys don’t think Nokia own my soul.

-ST

28
Mar
12

Tenacious D Back From The Dead!

tenac_44441198Tenacious D always walked that fine line between a being a spoof band vs actually writing some decent classic stadium rock

The problem with the band is that they don’t take themselves seriously at all, so why should anyone else? I mean who ever heard of someone actually buying a Tenacious D album?

Sure, “Tribute” is probably kicking around on your playlist from the early 2000s along with “Wonderboy” and “Fuck Her Gently” but that’s about as far as it goes which isn’t very far for a band that has two (dick-joke laden) albums out.

So I’m making it my mission to buy and review their new album Rise Of The Fenix when it lands in May to see if it’s a load of turd or something actually worth listening to. In the meantime, here’s the promo video they put out for the album, featuring Val Kilmer and Dave Grohl.

 

 

Party on Wayne.

-ST

28
Mar
12

Treefiddy Review: Blood Red Shoes – In Time To Voices

BloodRedShoesInTimeToVoices600Gb150312The Down Lizzo:

Blood Red Shoes’ first two albums, 2008’s Box Of Secrets and 2010’s Fire Like This were packed with huge, aggressive punk-pop hooks that surged with energy and kicked like a mule.

Now this Brighton-based duo are branching out with In Time To Voices on which, singer/guitarist Laura-Mary Carter and drummer/vocalist Steve Ansell tone things down considerably.

It takes some getting used to, and fans of their acerbic brand of punk-pop will find the album lacking the punch-to-the-gut force of Box Of Secrets and Fire Like This, but to be perfectly frank another album like the first two would have buried this band as surely as Billy Talent’s last effort buried them.

 

 

It’s the golden rule of writing albums. Find a sound that works with the first one, hone that sound on the second and change it on the third. In Time To Voices follows this formula and in doing so, breathes new life into this band.

Killer Tracks:

The first single off In Time With Voices, “Cold” is definitely one of the finest tracks on the album. From Ansell’s throbbing double bass pedal drumming to Carter’s lurching power chords, it’s a track that smacks of grungey goodness with a healthy dose of anthemic pop-punk thrown in for good measure.

The tension in the verse of “Lost Kids” builds quickly, exploding in the chorous with Carter and Ansell singing “Let it all come undone / cut it down, down to none”.

 

 

“Night Light” wanders into full on Smashing Pumpkins Ava Adore territory. It’s a track rich with acoustic melodies interwoven with melancholy piano parts that really drive home the chorous line “It’s the ghost you made of me…”

“Stop Kicking” and “Slip Into The Blue” are both tight, deceptively infectious tracks that Carter and Ansell play like hidden aces near the end of the album.

Their vocal interplay has never sounded sweeter than it does on In Time With Voices. Ansell in particular has taken on more of the vocal duties which, considering how intense his style of drumming is, might not have been the best call for their live performances, but I’ll reserve judgement on that one until some kind benefactor and reader of this site sponsors a flight to the UK so I can watch them live.

 

Should You Give A Shit?

Are the Kennedys gun-shy? Of course you should give a shit! It’s a crying shame how many people don’t give a shit about this band.

My advice is buy all three of their albums so you can track just how much this band has blossomed on In Time To Voices and then let’s have this conversation again.

In the meantime, here’s “Slip Into The Blue” to get you in the mood.

 

 

Final verdict: 8/10

-ST

27
Mar
12

Desmond And THe Tutus Infomercial – Too Far?

728-400-1Some people who have seen Desmond And The Tutus’ infomercial promoting their new album Mnusic think it’s shot in bad taste and is a poor attempt at marketing this band. But I’m not one of them.

The infomercial features a bullshit cure-all doctor who could have literally stepped off one of those dodgey pamphlets they hand out at traffic lights and is packed to the max with awesome.

People who want to be mermaids, failed attempts at slicing tomatoes, fucking rats that eat your feet and a narrative that makes absolutely no sense at all are just some of the things that make this video amazing.

For the rest, you’re gonna have to hit the play button below. Eeeaaasssyyyyy does it…

 

 

It’s like everything that’s painfully shit about infomercials rolled into 3 minutes and 50 seconds of a waking nightmare I once had after 5 tabs of acid.

That last shot in particular is definitely a winner.

I’ll try get my filthy mitts on that album to review it for you guys. In the meantime, follow Desmond And The Tutus on Twitter (@desmondandtutus) and share that video with everyone you know.

Easy peasy.

-ST

27
Mar
12

Nomu Launches Half Arsed-a Chef, Slick Makes A Cameo

nomu_stir_largeSo a couple weeks back your pal Slicky-T was asked to take part in an epic spoof of Master Chef brought to you by the good folks at Nomu.

Naturally my agent handled everything, I just showed up at the Nomu studio where I was greeted by cross section of Cape Town’s A-list influencers and more wine than you could shake a tin of Nomu beef rub at (courtesy of Andre Pentz, what a badass).

Everyone from bloggers Big Daddy Savage and Dax to comedienne Angel to 2OceansViber Richard Hardiman was there. Even SA celeb Leslie Van Der Westhuizen showed up and covered the Nomu kitchen from one end to the other in a bizarre mix of chocolate powder, soy sauce, melk skommel and other ingredients which shall remain nameless.

The result was a series of sick videos we’re calling “Half Arsed-a Chef”, the first episode of which “The Boerie Tower” follows below.

Unfortunately they had to cut me out of this episode entirely except for the opening credits, something about my performance over shadowing the rest of the contestants, but just you wait. There are at least another three or four episodes of the show and obviously they’re saving the best for last.

 

 

In case you were wondering, my team (Bubbles and Caylee) were the ones responsible for “The Alsatian” – the tightest boerie tower ever coiled around cardboard.

Stay tuned folks, more of that good shit to come Winking smile

-ST

27
Mar
12

Fruit And Veg Shitty?

fruit_vegetables_IMG_9730-757340J-Rab and I have been meaning to take our grocery shopping experience to a whole other level by hitting up the Fruit and Veg City near Gardens.

We were in the market for some fresh, affordable produce because fruit and vegetables are an important ally in the fight against scurvy (we learned that the hard way).

So we set off on Saturday, already silently congratulating ourselves for being so progressive in our choice of fruit and vegetable vendor only to encounter a distinctly average shopping experience.

Walking in, one of the Fruit and Veg trolley jockeys drove a trolley square into my Achilles tendon, which is to be expected in a store that looks like someone with one eye laid it out.

 

 

We spent the next twenty minutes painstakingly navigating our way through cramped, badly laid out isles only to queue for a till that didn’t have a card facility, forcing me to stand at another isle to pay for my groceries.

In retrospect that’s probably the moment when an opportunistic fellow shopper / Fruit and Veg employee decided to make off with our tinned tomatoes which mysteriously disappeared between putting them in our basket and driving back home.

 

 

To add insult to injury the lettuce pillow cases, which any vegetarian will tell you are the cornerstone of healthy living, looked sad and soggy and the free range chicken legs we bought decided to expire spectacularly after we bought them, exactly one day before the sell by date.

To be honest, I felt more than a little relieved when we discovered that the rancid smell in the kitchen was the chicken and not the imaginary farts J-Rab kept accusing me of making.

AND (last one I promise) the loaf of rye bread we bought on Saturday had started growing mould by Monday, which is probably the worst day to have to deal with mouldy anything.

 

 

We were drawn to Fruit and Veg City by the promise of quality fruit and vegetables at bargain prices and were greeted instead with pretty much the same prices you pay anywhere and ropey food.

Sure, not ALL the food was ropey, you can lower your pitchforks. It was really just the salad we saw, the mouldy rye bread we bought and the chicken that turned on us faster than a rabid housepet. The fruit we bought was top-quality, but it’s not really that much cheaper than Pick ‘n Pay.

Did I just go on a bad day? Any of you guys shop there regularly? Should we bother going back?

-ST

26
Mar
12

Science Proves That Getting Mildly Drunk Inspires Creativity

mildlydrunkYeah, like we didn’t already know that one.

You gotta love science though, swooping in like Captain Obvious to point out shit we figured out years ago and backing that up with some tests they performed on their mates. Case in point: the recent study published in Consciousness and Cognition that found that moderate drunkness inspires creativity.

Researches invited a record-breaking group of 40, that’s right FOUR ZERO, young men who were social drinkers to eat bagels, get a little sauced up and watch Ratatouille, after which 69% of the tipsy guys admitted to crying at the end (joking. But I’d bet good money they blubbed like little girls).

 

 

At the end, the drunk guys not only solved the questions they were asked relating to the film faster, but they answered 58% of their questions correctly, compared to the measly 42% the sober Joes got right.

The test subjects were kept just below the legal limit for the test though which, let’s be honest, is hardly drunk at all.

Their staggering conclusion following these ground-breaking tests? Getting moderately drunk dampens our brain’s “executive function”, ie. the rational, logical part of the brain. Thus, if less executive function is inked to more creativity, this might explain why writers, artists and musicians are more vulnerable to substance abuse.

 

 

Well done science. Pat on the back.

As facetious as I’d like to be about this though, it now gives me a legitimate excuse to smash a glass or two of whisky in the evenings before I sit down to write.

Now I just gotta find an excuse for the two at breakfast, the three at elevensies, the five over lunch and the two at teatime and I’m all set!

Hit Time.com for the original piece here.

-ST

26
Mar
12

SlickTiger Gets His Mits On Angry Birds Space. Kisses Life Goodbye

angry-birds-space-launch-trailerI got the original Angry Birds on my Nokia N8 to kill some time when I was waiting for important life-stuff to happen and ended up getting hopelessly addicted to it for about a week or so.

Even after that I’d still revisit levels and shoot for 3 stars on them just for the hell of it. The physics were water-tight and there’s no denying I got a kick out of destroying shit and popping green pigs.

Then two weeks ago I read that NASA had partnered with Rovio for the newest instalment in the franchise, Angry Birds Space and, 3 days into playing it, I can honestly say the results are nothing short of brain-meltingly awesome.

If I was single, I have no doubt I would be elbows-deep in this game right now, but I’ve had to ration my playing to avoid BECOMING single, so as I write this, I’m about to finish “Pig Bang”, the first of two worlds (“Cold Cuts” is the second) that make up Angry Birds Space.

 

 

There is a third world called “Danger Zone” that can be unlocked with an in-app purchase (although on the iPad version I bought, it came unlocked) for hardcore Angry Birds fans who want to experience some insanely difficult gameplay.

The premise is the same as previous Angry Birds games. You fire birds in a slingshot to create domino-effect destruction on a massive scale in an effort to pop some smug little (and not-so-little) green pigs.

However, the massive change with Angry Birds Space is the way they’ve tweaked the gravity to make for an amazingly addictive and challenging gaming experience.

When firing birds in space their trajectory is dead straight, but the minute they enter an asteroid’s gravitational field their trajectory warps significantly. Depending on their angle of entry, this can result in them orbiting an asteroid at breakneck speed only to smash some piggy structures into splinters in the most satisfying way imaginable.

 

 

They’ve also thrown some new twists into the game in the form of “Eggsteroid” levels you can unlock by finding and smashing the golden eggs strewn about the normal levels.

These unlockable levels take the form of popular old-school games like Mario and Space Invaders and add a nice additional dimension to this addictive-as-crack demolition physics masterpiece.

You also get randomly awarded Space Eagles, which open up gigantic black holes, sucking those smug green basterds into piggy oblivion.

The new birds on the block are the ice birds who freeze the pigs and structures they collide into, thus making them more brittle for your other birds to decimate.

 

 

I really don’t think I need to bang on about this game for much longer. Buy it, play it and if shit gets too intense, swing by First Methodist on Tuesday nights. We have a group that kicks off at 7.00pm – the coffee is free but if it’s your first time, all we ask is that you introduce yourself to the rest of the group.

Admitting you have a problem is purely voluntary Winking smile

-ST