Archive for July 16th, 2012

16
Jul
12

“Steve” Found Dead In Hillbrow Apartment

hanging-man-450Yesterday evening, just before the Carte Blanche death-knoll sounded on SA TV’s across the country, police were called to the scene of an apparent suicide in the Hillbrow area.

Disgruntled Beep Bank employee “Steve” was found hanging in his flat by his landlord who had received complaints of a “bad smell” coming from the apartment.

“The minute that smell hit me, I knew that Steve had offed himself,” said Themba Sisolezi, Steve’s neighbour. “Everyone hated the guy, including me. I’m so glad he’s dead, everyone is.”

Steve, who was appointed to the acquisition and retention branch of Beep Bank just over a year ago, was ostracised on a daily basis by every human he came into contact with because Beep Bank don’t offer a banking app or free iPads.