Archive for October 2nd, 2012


The SlickTiger Guide To STEALING A OKE’S SHIT!

Champions_League_T20_LogoOkes, I can tell you one thing flippin’ straight. Not since I klapped too much roids one day when I was a bouncer and broke a oke’s jaw for forgetting his ID in the car have I ever, EVER been so flippin’ ready to tear a oke a new ARSEHOLE.

What has flippin PISSED ME OFF SO MUCH? I’ll tell you what, plaguerism, that’s what.

Plaguerism is a word my lawyer taught me that comes from a time when ous got lank sick and DIED because of a disease spread by RATS THAT WERE COVERED IN KAK.

In this case, the disease that is being spread around is adverts for some flippin chophead moffie sport where ous hit the other ous little red balls around and the rats COVERED IN KAK that are spreading it are the advertising dooses who STOLE IT FROM ME!

Don’t believe me?! Jasis. Do you live under a flippin’ rock?

Here’s what I mean:



Fuck okes. Well done. What a clever idea for an advertisement campaign. “Klap It”. I mean hell, the ou who came up with that is such a ORIGINAL CHARNA, no one has never used that one before, “Klap It”.

And just when you think it can’t get any flippin worse, I see THIS kak:



Can you believe those flippin those KAK COVERED RATS could be such a buncha CHOPHEADS that they would PLAGUERISE a oke’s LIVES WORK like that?!

“Klap it Titans”!??! “See you there boet”!??!?!

Whoever made that kak, let me explain something very, VERY flippin’ carefully to you.







And so is this KLAPPING IT:



Now that you understand that, lemme ask you flippin KAK COVERED RATS a simple question.

Is THIS klapping it?



What about this?



And this?!



I mean these ous must think they’re dealing with a real flippin’ doos if they think they can just steal the BUFFEST CHARNA IN THE LAND’S BUFFEST EXPRESSION AND USE IT FOR THE BIGGEST MOFFIE SPORT TO EVER BE INVENTED!

Please okes, someone tell me this is some kind of big flippin’ joke and tomorrow when I wake up all this kak will be over.

Just so that I can remind anyone who might have forgotten, though yes, the expression might have existed in spoken language before, the oke to put it into writing and flippin CLAIM IT FOR ONCE AND ALL WAS ME, SLICKTIGER.

Don’t believe me? Ok, then how about you read the following:

The SlickTiger Guide to Klapping Gym Boet!
The SlickTiger Guide To Klapping Gym Boet Part 2: Know Your Blonde Belter
Okes Who Like To KLAP IT #1
Okes Who Like To Klap It #2 – Extreme Rukby Tackles
Okes Who Like To Klap It #3 – Boychay On A Beach (NSFW)
Okes Who Like To KLAP IT #4 – Wolfpack RFC Vs Durbanville 5
Okes Who Like To Klap It #5 – Paul Main Man
Okes Who Like To Klap It #6: Legwarmer Boychay
Okes Who Like To Klap It #7 – Another Legwarmer Boychie!
Okes Who Like To Klap It #8: Belters In Legwarmers!
Okes Who Like To Klap It #9: Moffie Socks Classes!
Okes Who Like To Klap It #10: ANTON TAYLOR
Okes Who Like To Klap It #11: DASO Poster
Okes Who Like To Klap It #12: Old Spice Charna
Okes Who Like To Klap It #13: Bromance Charnas
Okes Who Like To Klap It #14: Mullet CHarna
Okes Who Like To Klap It #15: Avastar Nightclub Charna
Okes Who Like To Klap It #16: Moer a oke for Jesus
Okes Who Like To Klap It #17: Cameron Van Der Burgh
Okes Who Like To Klap It #19: 4-Man Kanoe Charnas
Okes Who Like To Klap It #20: Right-Handed Tokoloshe Catcher


I mean fuck. If writing 21 posts about “Klapping It” doesn’t mean a oke owns that expression then I’ll eat the minivan I benchpressed for my warm up set yesterday.

You show me someone who used the expression “Klapping It” or “Klap It” IN WRITING before the 9th Februaury 2010 when my guide first went virile and I’ll admit I’ve maybe taken too much roids today and am losing it.

Otherwise, I want ous to send this post to EVERYONE THEY KNOW and I want those ous to send it to EVERYONE THEY KNOW AND EVERYONE THEY KNOW AND EVERYONE THEY KNOW.

I want the whole flippin’ world to know that the DOOSES behind the Champions League Cricket Twenty20 are a buncha KAK COVERED RATS who are so flippin’ UNORIGINAL, LAZY and DOFF that they have to steal a ous LIVES WORK to make poor people who don’t know any better think the moffie sport of cricket is actually worth watching.

Ous must know. When you steal the only thing to ever make a ou famous, that ou is gonna come after you and when he finds you, I hope for your flippin’ sake you like hospital food.