Archive for the 'Being Slick' Category


A Thousand Promises Of Pain To Come

MarvI never forgot that line, the one from Sin City after Marv snaps the cuffs on that weird little freak and knocks him the fuck out. They cut to this epic shot of Marv having a smoke, covered in blood.

He says: “I try to slow my heart down and breathe the fire out of my lungs. My muscles make me a thousand promises of pain to come”. For some reason I never forgot that line.

Especially the part about the promises of pain to come. I finally trained again yesterday, it was a giant pile of dogshit session, I was weak as a kitten and running on fumes before I was even half done.


The Cub Speaks!

The CubI can’t say I’ve been having many great days this month (as you might have noticed by the lack of posts), but I had a great moment yesterday, one that has made everything else worth it.

I’ve been trying to get The Cub to say a particular word. I’ve been pretty tenacious about it – making sure I repeat it and point to what it describes at least 5 times a day.

I think about two weeks ago she figured out exactly what the word meant and why I want her to say it because every time I said it to her, she got this naughty little grin and immediately clammed up.


Is The Wii U The Worst Console To Ever Be Designed Ever? (Part 1)

black1In my 30 years of existence, I have owned exactly one console which is a bizarre fact for someone who has gamed since he was six years old. Oh wait, I lie. I owned a Game Boy back in the day, does that count?

For the most part I was a PC gamer in my youth and teenage years though I sank countless hours into my friends’ Golden Chinas, SNESes, Playstations and Playstation 2s whenever the opportunity arose.

At the ripe old age of 29 I finally decided to buy my very own console and what did I go with? Did I pre-order a PS4 or X-Box One? No, I bought history’s worst thought-out, named and marketed console, the Wii U.


A Story For Valentine’s Day

Fire-Heart-Wallpaper-HD1There’s a story I’ve been meaning to share with you guys for some time now and it being Valentine’s Day and all, I figure now’s as good a time as any.

Two days before J-Rab was scheduled to go in for her caesar, we decided to drive out to Stellenbosch and go back to where our life in Cape Town first started.

We were like two star-crossed salmon, swimming fin-in-fin back upstream to where it all began. It was early spring and the sun was beaming down on us as we rolled out the city, skyscrapers and ocean fading to mountains and vineyards.


The Cub Is 6 Months Old Today

2014-02-06 11.07.18So I want all of you guys, all of you crazy beautiful people who read this site to join me in wishing my little girl a happy half-year birthday! Can you believe how quickly it’s going by?! Yeah, me neither…

People ask me all the time how The Cub is, how J-Rab is and how we’re all doing as a family and I find myself at a complete loss for words. Mostly I just smile from ear to ear and tell them it’s been amazing in every way.

J-Rab and I still have moments where we stare in total wonder at this tiny human and can’t believe we actually made her.


Fun With Beards

crazy_facial_hair_01Not every man can grow a beard, which is precisely why not every man should. You don’t ever want to be that guy who is very obviously trying to grow a beard that just isn’t there. Nobody likes that guy.

For most of my life, I put myself squarely in the category of “Men who should never try to grow a beard” and I was happy there. I shaved weekly and life carried on.

Then at the end of 2012 I decided to stop shaving two weeks before holidays began and just see what happened. Much to my surprise, 6 weeks later I was sporting a beard that made me look like a legit woodsman.


In 2014 We Play The Guitar, Owwwww Yeeeeeaaaaahhhhhh…

realistic_flaming_guitar_fireI used to play. Back in the glory days. I remember the first night I played for a bar full of people. It wasn’t even on my own guitar, it was on this guy called Will’s guitar.

The guitar I had at the time was a total piece of shit. The action on the fretboard felt like I was trying to play a fucking bow and arrow so I said fuck that, and borrowed this guy Will’s guitar.

Will’s guitar was a thing of wonder. Yellow wood acoustic steel string, rich tone, so fucking easy to play. Will couldn’t play for shit so I felt like I was doing the guy a favour.


The Tiger Family Photoshoot

6660267355_c1f8412e1e_oIf you have a baby, the golden rule is the minute that little bundle of poop joy can smile, you HAVE TO take him / her to a professional photographer and shell out a small fortune to have family pics taken.

If you don’t do this, print the pics out on canvas and block-mount them in the most visible place in your house, you are a total failure as a parent.

People will judge you, especially other parents who are pissed that they went ahead and dropped a couple of thou on their family photoshoot and you have the audacity not to follow suit.


Expectation Vs Reality: The Toad That Wasn’t

nurse-expectation-vs-realityAs some of you guys may know, I recently became a dad, which now means that I have changed things up from handling about 30% of the duties around the house to 80%.

I have no issue whatsoever with this marked increase in householdly responsibility because of the simple fact that J-Rab is on baby duty 100% of the time. It’s a full-time job and one that she’s way, way better at than me.

My evening routine now consists of baby-washing, dish-washing, food-preparing, food-eating, general tidying and occasionally clothes-washing, clothes-drying, clothes-folding and clothes-putting-awaying.


One Month

image45sA lot can change in a month. Hell, a lot can change in an hour, a minute, a second.

Sometimes it’s hard to gauge the extent of that change when you’re in the moment. It’s like we have this built in anti-panic mechanism that kicks into overdrive when things are getting crazy and allows us to honestly believe that everything is ok when all hell is breaking loose.

It was like that in theatre. They wheel you into this sterile space where your life is about to change forever, laughing and joking like you’re going for a Sunday stroll and you play along because a Sunday stroll is a shitload less terrifying than what’s about to happen.