Posts Tagged ‘whisky

22
Nov
11

The Road To Synergy: Part 2 – Radio Silence

insaneLife is fucking funny.

I’ve been thinking about my buddy, Guitar Jon who once, in a very drunken state, decided to tell everyone about ROCK AND ROLL!

We were varsity students getting fucked up in some bar or other that had a clever name and was wildly popular on Sunday nights in Jozi, but I’m pretty sure it closed down at least 3 years ago.

Guitar Jon was feeling low and disillusioned and like no one understood him (we’ve all been there), so he stood on one of the tables outside and delivered the following diatribe:

04
Mar
11

It Probably Seemed Like A Great Idea At The Time…

Posing with your mom for a print advert, pretty harmless right?

Posing with your mom for a ‘Got Milk’ advert? Hmm, we’re starting to get into some dangerous territory here…

But posing with your mom when she’s Sofia Vergara in this specific Got Milk ad could very well be the dumbest move in a career that started and ended in pretty much exactly the same moment.

Ladies and gentlemen I present to you, my new favourite Got Milk ad:

 

 

So yeah, that strapping young lad is Manolo Vergara, Sofia’s 19 year old son and no, he’s NEVER gonna live this down.

03
Nov
10

It’s my Birthday

So yeah, donations welcome (email tellthetiger@gmail.com to set up an EFT).

I’ve got a crazy assed day lined up as I’m in the business of fine whisky and today the Whisky Live Festival begins, so think of me while I’m toiling away at the festival until 10 tonight when I should be getting fanned with palm leaves and enjoying a dram of the good stuff.

Here’s an appropriate picture…um, kinda…

 

 

Later masturbators.

-ST

16
Aug
10

The Weekend Gets A Solid 8/10

Even though it’s fucking shitty Monday again and even though we’re all right back here, right where we were last week and even though no one’s boiled up any fucking coffee yet because everyone that works here are jerks and all those emails you chose to ignore on Friday are burning little holes of guilt in your inbox like smouldering cigarette cherries through your prep school blazer, even though all this shit’s happening, I think we can agree that the weekend that just past?

It was pretty awesome.

 

 

23
Jun
10

In Whisky There Is Comfort Still

I had this way of picking up things and drinking them when I was a kid, probably like most kids do. When I was 3, the electrician came at night to fix something or other and my mom offered him a beer, which he drank a sip of and left on the living room table.

I picked that bad boy up and drank the whole thing. Then I jumped up and down in my cot, laughing my ass off for about 2 hours and then I passed out stone cold and woke up feeling fine the next day. There’s Irish in me, not a lot (my grandfather was half English, half Irish), but enough 😉

08
Mar
10

Top Four Reasons Why Drinking An Entire Bottle Of Whisky Before Work Is A Good Idea

It’s Monday morning and I know what you’re thinking.

“Fuck” is probably it, followed shortly by, “this again.”

Well, I have good news. Thanks to a miracle remedy I recently discovered, your work days no longer have to smack of mindless repetition, bullshit meetings and faking that you enjoy the company a bunch of people you wouldn’t piss on if they were on fire.

That miracle remedy, ladies and gentlemen, is whisky. Don’t believe me? Well then, read my top four reasons why drinking an entire bottle of whisky before work is a good idea.*

Ready? Atta boy! Let’s get started!

22
Jan
10

The Most Hungover I’ve Ever Been At Work

It’s Friday guys, hell yeah! Hands up who’s hungover from smashing tequilas into their face last night! C’mon, be honest – you at the back there, what’s your name? Eh? Dave? Fuck dude, you look like something I watched come out of a stray dog’s backside once, what the fuck are you doing at work?!

 

 

Fridays when I’m hungover at work always remind me of the infamous Friday-that-shall-not-be-named a few years back when I dragged my sorry ass to work, praying with all the strength left in me that my hangover would just cut the fucking foreplay and kill me already.

12
Nov
09

Whisky In The Jar-o – Part 1

The thing about people is that they’ll buy into whatever bullshit you’re selling you if you look and act the part. In fact, you don’t even really have to act the part too much, just look it and you’re 80% of the way there.

Last night was the opening night of the FNB Whisky Live Festival, the biggest consumer whisky festival in the world and there I was missioning around with the photographer we hired to cover the event, looking all important with my executive leather Mastercard branded flip file and two-way radio complete with an ear piece that made me look like some kind of high-level bodyguard.