Posts Tagged ‘duck vaginas


Scientifically Accurate Ducktales Confirms That Ducks Are On A Whole Other Level Of Messed Up

Scientifically Accurate DucktailsYou guys remember the video I posted awhile back called “True Facts About Ducks?” If so, let me just apologise again for subjecting you to it because ducks, as it turns out, are very, very fucked up.

The guys who brought you “Scientifically Accurate Spiderman” must have watched “True Facts About Ducks” because everything you’re about to see in the following video is indeed true.

All I can say is thank Jeebers we all watched the normal version of Ducktales as children as opposed to the scientifically accurate version because if we’d been subjected to the latter, our fragile little minds would have been irreparably damaged.

Here’s the original theme song in case you don’t remember it:



And here’s the scientifically accurate version (WARNING: Don’t watch this if you are easily offended or still feeling sensitive after the recent FHM debacle):



Um… go science?



Ducks Are Very, Very Fucked Up

PLUSH_2711_ALT_4b5488a6362b0Jesus. I actually have no idea how to describe what I’ve just seen and almost feel bad re-posting it here for you, my poor unsuspecting readers, to have to try to deal with.

Ducks, as it turns out, are extremely, extremely fucked up. You know the famous expression “fuck a duck”? Probably not seeing as I invented it… but anyway, long story short, do not EVER fuck a duck. EVER.

What you’re about to see is two things 1) Expertly narrated by Morgan Freeman and 2) the very stuff nightmares are made of. I am not being over dramatic here, think very carefully before you watch this because it will destroy your perception of ducks forever.

Good luck watching this soldier. I’ll be right here when it’s over, probably also staring at my screen in total disbelief.

Here goes…



Yeah. What the actual fuck.

I’m going home to scrub myself raw with steel wool and rubbing alcohol.

And to think I fed those fuckers my bread.

Never again.