Archive for March 27th, 2012

27
Mar
12

Desmond And THe Tutus Infomercial – Too Far?

728-400-1Some people who have seen Desmond And The Tutus’ infomercial promoting their new album Mnusic think it’s shot in bad taste and is a poor attempt at marketing this band. But I’m not one of them.

The infomercial features a bullshit cure-all doctor who could have literally stepped off one of those dodgey pamphlets they hand out at traffic lights and is packed to the max with awesome.

People who want to be mermaids, failed attempts at slicing tomatoes, fucking rats that eat your feet and a narrative that makes absolutely no sense at all are just some of the things that make this video amazing.

For the rest, you’re gonna have to hit the play button below. Eeeaaasssyyyyy does it…

 

 

It’s like everything that’s painfully shit about infomercials rolled into 3 minutes and 50 seconds of a waking nightmare I once had after 5 tabs of acid.

That last shot in particular is definitely a winner.

I’ll try get my filthy mitts on that album to review it for you guys. In the meantime, follow Desmond And The Tutus on Twitter (@desmondandtutus) and share that video with everyone you know.

Easy peasy.

-ST

27
Mar
12

Nomu Launches Half Arsed-a Chef, Slick Makes A Cameo

nomu_stir_largeSo a couple weeks back your pal Slicky-T was asked to take part in an epic spoof of Master Chef brought to you by the good folks at Nomu.

Naturally my agent handled everything, I just showed up at the Nomu studio where I was greeted by cross section of Cape Town’s A-list influencers and more wine than you could shake a tin of Nomu beef rub at (courtesy of Andre Pentz, what a badass).

Everyone from bloggers Big Daddy Savage and Dax to comedienne Angel to 2OceansViber Richard Hardiman was there. Even SA celeb Leslie Van Der Westhuizen showed up and covered the Nomu kitchen from one end to the other in a bizarre mix of chocolate powder, soy sauce, melk skommel and other ingredients which shall remain nameless.

The result was a series of sick videos we’re calling “Half Arsed-a Chef”, the first episode of which “The Boerie Tower” follows below.

Unfortunately they had to cut me out of this episode entirely except for the opening credits, something about my performance over shadowing the rest of the contestants, but just you wait. There are at least another three or four episodes of the show and obviously they’re saving the best for last.

 

 

In case you were wondering, my team (Bubbles and Caylee) were the ones responsible for “The Alsatian” – the tightest boerie tower ever coiled around cardboard.

Stay tuned folks, more of that good shit to come Winking smile

-ST

27
Mar
12

Fruit And Veg Shitty?

fruit_vegetables_IMG_9730-757340J-Rab and I have been meaning to take our grocery shopping experience to a whole other level by hitting up the Fruit and Veg City near Gardens.

We were in the market for some fresh, affordable produce because fruit and vegetables are an important ally in the fight against scurvy (we learned that the hard way).

So we set off on Saturday, already silently congratulating ourselves for being so progressive in our choice of fruit and vegetable vendor only to encounter a distinctly average shopping experience.

Walking in, one of the Fruit and Veg trolley jockeys drove a trolley square into my Achilles tendon, which is to be expected in a store that looks like someone with one eye laid it out.

 

 

We spent the next twenty minutes painstakingly navigating our way through cramped, badly laid out isles only to queue for a till that didn’t have a card facility, forcing me to stand at another isle to pay for my groceries.

In retrospect that’s probably the moment when an opportunistic fellow shopper / Fruit and Veg employee decided to make off with our tinned tomatoes which mysteriously disappeared between putting them in our basket and driving back home.

 

 

To add insult to injury the lettuce pillow cases, which any vegetarian will tell you are the cornerstone of healthy living, looked sad and soggy and the free range chicken legs we bought decided to expire spectacularly after we bought them, exactly one day before the sell by date.

To be honest, I felt more than a little relieved when we discovered that the rancid smell in the kitchen was the chicken and not the imaginary farts J-Rab kept accusing me of making.

AND (last one I promise) the loaf of rye bread we bought on Saturday had started growing mould by Monday, which is probably the worst day to have to deal with mouldy anything.

 

 

We were drawn to Fruit and Veg City by the promise of quality fruit and vegetables at bargain prices and were greeted instead with pretty much the same prices you pay anywhere and ropey food.

Sure, not ALL the food was ropey, you can lower your pitchforks. It was really just the salad we saw, the mouldy rye bread we bought and the chicken that turned on us faster than a rabid housepet. The fruit we bought was top-quality, but it’s not really that much cheaper than Pick ‘n Pay.

Did I just go on a bad day? Any of you guys shop there regularly? Should we bother going back?

-ST