Archive for July, 2011



africa-photos-284You guys aren’t going to fucking believe this, but I found out yesterday that the video I scripted, acted in, directed, half-shot and edited for the Nandos “How Far Will You Go” campaign fucking won!

I got the call yesterday from someone who introduced herself as a person handling Nandos communications, at which point I thought, “Thank fuck! They’re finally gonna give me the free meal vouchers they owe me” because I’m poor and I could really use some free food.

Then she tells me she has good news for me and I immediately think “YES! Chicken dinner tonight bitches!” but then she tells me I’ve won a R20 000 holiday anywhere in Africa and I instantly lose my shit completely!

So I guess the big question now is, where the hell do I go?! In a few days time a travel agent is going to contact me and send all kinds of options through for different travel packages all over Africa. It’s fucking crazy, the way I understand it all I have to do is pick and choose the packages I want that add up to R20k, book some leave and unleash myself on the continent!



So help me out here guys, the only place in Africa I’ve ever visited is Swaziland, that’s IT. Where would you go if you had a R20k travel budget?

I hear ZANZIBAR is fucking sick. I just like saying the word – ZANZIBAR!

Leave suggestions in the comments or hit me on

You gotta love this crazy fucked up thing called life. Run around hungover with your underpants on the outside the one day and you’re jetting off across Africa the next.

Here’s the video I submitted if you’re wondering what the hell that last sentence means:



A HUGE thanks to my loving girlfriend J-Rab and Jennyjenjen for helping me turn that fucking weird idea for an ad into a reality. You guys rock, I seriously couldn’t have done it without you.

Have a killer weekend party people. If anyone’s heading through to Assembly tonight, come hunt me down for a celebratory drink or five Winking smile



Graphic Novel Review: Chew (Vol.1 – Tasters Choice)

Chew01As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I used to read a boatload more comic books and graphic novels back in varsity than I do now, but ever since attending Free Comic Book Day a few months back, I’ve gotten hooked again.

So once in awhile I’ll be spitting these reviews out when I find a particularly sick graphic novel I think you’ll dig and first on that list has to be Chew.

Written by John Layman and drawn and coloured by Rob Guillory, Chew has to be one of the funniest, most twisted and original graphic novels I’ve read in years.

The protagonist, a detective called Tony Chu, has a completely bizarre superpower if you can even call it that.

He gets psychic impressions from the things he eats.



One evening his life takes a turn for the darker when the chef at a restaurant where he’s eating cuts himself accidentally and bleeds into the meal he’s preparing for Tony. One taste and BAM! Tony knows the chef’s entire life story, including the fact that he’s kidnapped and murdered 13 people.

And that’s literally just the first ten pages. Before Tony knows what’s hit him, he’s knees-deep in a case involving a missing health inspector, a reporter with the ability to make people taste the food she writes about, a portly, ass kicking FDA agent and a team of scientists stationed in the Arctic who spend the $34 million they get every year to fund their research getting totally wasted and partying with Russian strippers.

Chew boxes like a prizefighter, hitting hard and fast as the plot twists and turns through the craziest imaginable scenarios right up to the epic climax at it’s conclusion that is totally unexpected and leaves you hungry for more.



I wouldn’t even bother reading the rest of this drivel. I’m really not doing Chew any justice, just go out and read it, seriously, it’s fucking awesome and the art work is nothing to be taken lightly either.

Guillory’s meticulous attention to detail means you can easily miss all the visual gags Chew is packed full of if you aren’t looking for them, but when you are, finding them makes Chew all the more enjoyable.

I have Ricksaw to thank for Chew, awesome recommendation homes, thank you. And if anyone’s read Chew and would like to recommend something similar, don’t be shy.

Like I always say, if there’s one thing better than a great novel, it’s one with pictures Winking smile

Till next time.



You Need To Get Into This Band

blood_red_shoes2A good buddy of mine flew in from Scotland this past weekend, goes by the name of Ricky T.

He’s one of the oldest friends I have (we go back nearly twenty years) and the man has impeccable taste in music so if he recommends a band, I’m on it like white on rice.

So when he told me to check out Blood Red Shoes I bought both their albums straight up and man! You gotta hit the “read full post” link to hear this band…

I guess you’d call it underground alternative/punk with a nice grungey flavour. It’s definitely not indie, which is a refreshing change from most bands these days that all seem to play some variation of that genre. Vocal duties are shared between frontlady and guitarist Laura-Mary Carter and drummer Steven Ansell who pretty much make up the band.



What’s seriously impressive is the fact that Carter’s jams are tastier than she is which is saying a lot because a) just look at her, she’s a total hottie! And b) a girl?!? Playing guitar?!?

Look, don’t get me wrong, I’m well aware that girls can play the guitar (sort of), but not like this. The things this lady can do with an axe turn my legs to jelly. It’s beautiful, really, it’s like watching Cinderella punch a swan.

To perfectly demonstrate what I’m talking about, here’s a track called “Heartsink” off their second album Fire like This for you to sink your teeth into.

Just fucking dig that crunchy, blunt-force tone in the chorous, FUCK YEAH! BEEYATIFUL!



Go get both their albums right now, Box Of Secrets and Fire Like This and don’t thank me.

Thank Ricky T Winking smile



The Amy Winehouse Post

Amy Winehouse  Nice Photos  3Throughout most of her life, I wished Amy Winehouse would just hurry up and die already. For nearly three years she dominated local and international tabloids, every image of her somehow looking worse than the last.

It was like one of those wildlife documentaries where the film makers follow some poor, sick animal that’s dying in the wild and instead of helping it, they just film it getting weaker and weaker until it croaks.

It was clear to me that there was absolutely no hope for her. Her life degenerated to the point where all she seemed capable of doing was getting totally wasted and babbling incoherently like a bergie on a tik binge.

Was I surprised that she died on the weekend? Not in the slightest. I don’t think anyone was, in fact I think people were a lot more focussed on the tragedy that happened in Norway and rightly so.

But her death did make me stop and think about her for a minute, which was all it took to make me realise that I have no idea who Amy Winehouse was.

I honestly can’t remember ever seeing any proper interviews with her or ever hearing her speak when she wasn’t clearly off her face so I did a little digging online and found some early interviews with her and a couple of pictures of her before she got stuck into the drugs and the person I found couldn’t have been more different from the monster the media portrayed her to be.



Amy Winehouse had a wicked sense of humour and she was as feisty as they come. She had a gorgeous voice and was a truly talented performer and songwriter and back before she got strung out on crack she was a seriously beautiful woman.

I also realised that we’re the same age, give or take about a month, which kinda brought her death and life into focus for me because what the hell have I achieved at 27? How many Brit Awards have I won? How many Grammys? How many MTV VMAs?



I’d like to remember her as the person I met today. Not the fiend she became. We take for granted how easy it is for celebrities to fall into drugs and how fucking difficult it is to get out of that dark, dark hole.

So RIP Amy, wherever you might be, and thank you for the music, may it live on for longer than your brief stop-over on this crazy, beautiful, fucked up world.





Awesome Work Time-Wasters (Part III)

Winterbells01Ok, lemme just start this one with a disclaimer – it’s a little gay, but just like riding a scooter it’s a lot of fun until your friends find out.

I’m not too sure what the game’s actually called, so let’s just go with the “Gay Rabbit Game”. The purpose of the Gay Rabbit Game (GRG) is simply to jump and move your mouse around to touch as many bells as possible.

The more bells you touch, the higher you jump and the more points you score. Simple. Easy breezy. And great for avoiding actual work.

So go ahead and hit this link and give it a try. I can almost guarantee you you’ll get instantly hooked.



Definitely play this one with a mouse though, it’s frustrating as hell with a touchpad.

FINAL VERDICT: What starts out as “Lemme just play it one more time, I’m pretty sure I can top that last score…” will definitely end up as “Holy what the fuck! It’s Tuesday already?!”

What do you guys think of the Gay Rabbit Game? As always if you have suggestions for other great work time wasters, feel free to send them to



The Tree That Stalked Me


What you see on the left in this badass new formatting I’m going with to streamline the site a little, is a tree that has stalked me for the last three years.

I forget where I first saw the image of this tree but it’s the kind of image that sticks because, well, it’s pretty fucking awesome.

A couple years later I found this same image on another site with a pic credit in the bottom corner. After some Googling I found out this tree grows in Portland’s Japanese Garden and if you thought the tree was amazing, wait till you see the garden itself.

It’s like something out of an anime series. You wouldn’t believe places like this actually exist, play the soothing Japanesey music below from our friends Incubus (before they sucked) and check out these awesome pics.









Of all the trees in the world, I’m glad that one stalked me. It’s like being stalked by the Brooklyn Decker of the tree world Winking smile

Anyway, I must be getting soft in my old age posting all these girly pics of awesome places I wish I could visit.

Either that or I REALLY need a holiday.

Peace out party people, have a killer weekend.



Lose Your Shit Like Nicolas Cage

leaving_las_vegasIn some movies, Nicolas Cage is nothing short of mesmerising. He has an amazing ability to make you sympathise with his character whether he’s playing twin brothers who are total opposites or a weatherman in the midst of a mid-life crisis, there’s no denying that when he’s good, he’s fucking incredible.

But when he’s bad, hoo-wee, he’s fucking terrible. Anyone see Ghostrider? How about Windtalkers? Yeah, I rest my case.

And yet, people flock to see his movies, no matter how godawful they may or may not be because why?

Because MY GOD! The man knows how to completely lose his shit, as you’ll see in the following 4 minute sequence of Cage at his most shit-your-pants crazy that Civilian sent me yesterday.



Here’s a full list of all the movies courtesy of Pajiba.

0’09 – 0’30 Vampire’s Kiss

0’30 – 0’32 Ghost Rider

0’32 – 0’50 Vampire’s Kiss

0’50 – 1’11 Deadfall

1’11 – 1’19 Vampire’s Kiss

1’19 – 1’35 Deadfall (x2), Face/Off, Red Rock West (x2), Deadfall

1’35 – 1’43 The Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call

1’43 – 1’47 Matchstick Men

1’47 – 1’52 Leaving Las Vegas

1’52 – 1’55 Vampire’s Kiss

1’55 – 2’03 Bringing Out the Dead, Face/Off (x2), 8mm, Adaptation, Wild at Heart

2’03 – 2’17 Windtalkers, Raising Arizona, Bringing Out the Dead, The Wicker Man

2’17 – 2’21 Vampire’s Kiss

2’21 – 2’34 Deadfall

2’35 – 3’10 The Wicker Man

3’10 – 3’19 Deadfall

3’19 – 3’37 The Wicker Man

3’37 – 3’43 Ghost Rider

3’43 – 4’10 Zandalee


I always thought it would be fun to be an actor so you could completely lose your shit, but he really doesn’t look like he’s having much fun in these scenes, does he?

What a fucking maniac Smile 



Treefiddy Review: Incubus – If Not Now, When?

The Down Lizzo:

After a FIVE YEAR hiatus, alternative rock / funk metal / nu metal band Incubus are BACK! That’s right! Incubus! Y’know, the guys who wrote “Drive” back when we were all in highschool and then released a slew of critically and commercially successful albums?

Hello? (Is this thing on…?)


Sick Tracks

They’re all pretty sick if you’re talking about the traditional interpretation of the word, like that pale kid at school with the dark circles under his eyes who looked like he might ralph at any given moment. Oh wait, I think I’m confusing my life with the Simpsons…



Where was I? Oh yeah, new Incubus album review (*sigh).

Look, it’s not a bad album, it’s just a little limp noodley and lacking the oompf that made their previous albums great.

“Promises, Promises” is a really likeable song, totally non-threatening, radio-friendly and reminiscent of “Southern Girl” from A Crow Left Of The Murder. The dominant instrument on the track is the piano played by DJ Kilmore (the dude who used to rock the decks in previous incarnations of this band).

“Isadore” is also a solid track, carefully written and arranged it’s hard to fault it except it’s basically the same chord progression from “Talk Shows On Mute” (also from A Crow Left Of The Murder), only picked instead of strummed and frontman Brandon Boyd’s vocal melody is also strikingly similar.



The album changes pace abruptly near the end, like the band has suddenly woken up from a nice afternoon nap and remembered they’re fucking Incubus dude!

Halfway through “In The Company Of Wolves” things take an awesome turn for the darker and the mood of the album changes from happy-go-lucky summer picnic to, quick get the kids in the car! An asylum escapee is coming at us with a weird grin and a threatening erection.

“Switchblade” follows soon after, a throw-back to the powerful album that was Light Grenades and right after that, “Adolescents” (the first single off the album) kicks in to remind us that there was a time when this band used to rock out, unashamedly, and they were great at it.


Should You Give A Shit?

I guess so, I’m not sure. It could be that this album is a “grower”, it’s certainly gotten better with every listen that I’ve given it, but like I said at the beginning, it’s very tame for Incubus which I found disappointing.

Just take it for what it is, a collection of mostly easy-breezy, mature and thoughtful songs and you’ll probably enjoy it. I just don’t feel like I’m ready to get this old yet, but maybe once I have children of my own and I’m looking for something to put them to sleep to, I’ll revaluate my opinion of If Not Now, When?


Here’s “Patience, Patience” in the meantime.



Final verdict: 6/10




To everyone who dug the last short story I posted on this site, I have good news and I have bad news.

The good news is I’m writing another one! In fact I spent the whole of last night writing it and while it’s coming on nicely, it’s still got a way to go before it’s ready to be posted.

Which means the bad news is I got nothing to post today. Except this pic of my friend, SlickLion.



Sorry about that guys! Fucking time, I swear to God I never fucking have ANY of it, aarrargahrgahgr!

You’re awesome though. Please always read this site.

Your pal,


Easing Into Monday

Mondays usually inspire vitriolic rants from your Tiger pal about how we are nothing more than glorified corporate slaves.

After that I try to incite some kind of mass mutiny among the people who read this blog by suggesting they quit their meaningless jobs and go live on a tropical island, Survivor-style, where they can spear-fish and live in A-frame bamboo huts on the beach.



This Monday is different though. I want to share this cool video I found last night. Sure, it’s an advert for Canon, and yes, I feel a little dirty for regurgitating it shamelessly, but it happens to be a really cool video, so I don’t feel so bad doing it.

What you’re about to see is the result of someone covering a tiny speaker with a thin membrane and then dripping tiny drops of ink onto the membrane, playing music through the speakers and filming what happens next with super high speed cameras.



Watch that video with your headphones on at least five times to ease you into Monday and if you can’t watch videos, here are some stills to enjoy whilst listening to relaxing classical music (should have the same effect).





Happy Monday! Winking smile